Thursday, April 4, 2013

In which ceding household duties was a mistake

So around these parts, when I started my pre-pharmacy classes, I stopped paying the bills. It was too much stress to be in school and pay the bills.

Most of the time I regret this decision because I am very spreadsheet-oriented and people to whom I am married are not, so things don't get paid in as timely a manner as I'd like. Balance the checkbook? HAH there's no record of what checks were written, despite us having carbon copy check blanks... I haven't reclaimed this yet but it's a close thing. I try to let it go, but it is really really hard. Yes, I am much saner now that it isn't my job to manage the bills, but there's a price too.

More recently, I have seceded from my "responsible for child event planning" territory. I assigned the spouse to make the annual physical appointments for the 3 of us and the 6 week old check-up visit for the baby. Eventually these things happened. Let's not talk about the 3 attempts at getting the 5 year old to her appointment it took because it makes me crazy.

So kindergarten. That's happening sometime soon. The spouse called to request a packet about it several weeks ago but never really looked at the thing beyond opening it. Certainly no event reminders for kindergarten round-up were put on the digital calendar, because... no idea. I didn't do it, so I  didn't skip that step.

BUT today I was thinking to myself, "Hmm. I know that kindergarten has a round-up deal where the kids go on tours and we turn in paperwork. I wonder when that is... but I bet it's on the calendar." It was not. So I went to the school district calendar and discovered that kindergarten round-up is TODAY and tomorrow. Our kid's appointment is tomorrow morning. Great idea, except NO SIBLINGS ALLOWED.

That irks me a great deal, that there's no district-offered sibling care. I take the girls to an early childhood class and there's sibling care provided for a couple bucks or sometimes nothing. But this, a mandatory deal for my kid to go to kindergarten and I have to find someone to mind the sibling (and somehow be available at 9:30am... don't most people work? What is this glorp?). And isn't it one of those things, that many or even most children who are 5 or 6 have siblings who might need watching while the parents focus on the future kindergartener? It's also a weird thing, that there's a real baby I have to either stay home with or find someone to watch so I can take the kid to a major life event.

Gotta say, I'm possibly more irked bordering on downright grouchy about the lack of notice. It was hard for me to let go of my control of the bills, and of the child scheduling, and SEE HOW WELL THAT WENT? It caused me to be irritated enough with the surprise kindergarten round up that I had to write about it IN CAPITAL LETTERS. Ooof.


  1. I ... can't. There is just no way I could turn any of that over to my husband. It wouldn't get done. Like, ever.

    1. Same here. It just wouldn't happen. Blergh. This needing to worry about schedules and things happening on time is exactly the unpaid, unseen labor that women tend to do much more than men. I DO have almost every bill paid automatically now, so I can just flip through the mail in a few minutes.

  2. I second Josey. 100%. My guy was supposed to call the cable company to cancel Showtime and HBO and now, three months later, we're getting sucked back into Game of Thrones. That shit does not happen when he's in charge.

  3. What an unnecessary pain in the rear! I'd be tempted to strap the baby in a wearable carrier and take her anyway!

  4. Fuck it, I'd bring the kid. What are they going to do? Throw you out?

    (We will not even begin to discuss my spouse's ability to remember appointments. Let's just say, we each do what we're good at.)