Firsts, lasts, and middles

Last Sunday as we left a building to go retrieve the kid and spouse from a nearby playground via the parking lot, I asked Little Monster to hold my hand. Just like that, she did. She held on tight and walked beside me across the parking lot and down the path to the playground.

I got a first out of her. Most of her firsts have been shared between us parents or ignored while I was busy or happened at daycare but this time, just me. I bet if I asked around she's done this before but it was a little triumph anyway. First time walking In the parking lot holding my hand.

This evening I was tampering with something on the computer and I heard someone say "hi mommy" just out of sight over my shoulder. I turned and started to say "hi there Kid" but saw Little Monster instead. Sneaky baby, growing into a toddler. She owns a tiny plastic potty now and she can drink from a real cup and eat ice cream with a spoon and little mess.

It's easy to see now that there are so many lasts piling up too. Last time she calls a fox KITTY! Last time she screams about a bath (now she demands them often and splashes with glee). As cute as it is that she has mixed up "on," "off," "down," and "up," I'm not sure I will miss her shouting OFF! while struggling to zip her sweatshirt or put on socks. The hands outstretched to reach for me while shouting "down, Mommy?" will certainly be missed though.

It's interesting because I don't see any leaps in the kid's development lately. She's plowing along toward reading and adds a couple of words a week but no leap yet. Practicing her violin was too boring and yet too hard and there was never a proper time for it so we've given up for a bit. I keep hoping today is the last time she does one of her infuriating things (you know the things that make you nuts about your 3 year old? All that stuff only she's taller, stronger, and has more words to argue) but I'm sure it won't be so I'd be content to stretch the interval between moments.

I'm in the middle of rotations and it's scary how fast it's all going by. From this end I might buy the "oh, pharmacy school went so fast!" story I've heard from many pharmacists. Maybe. I suppose it's like parenting a preschooler. The hours take forever but the months fly by. I'm trying to gather all the lists of things I need to do and lists I need to make so I can try to keep it together. It isn't working so I'm going back to keeping my head above water. This next rotation is absolutely out of town so that's exciting and terrifying and all levels of panic to elation.