Thursday, February 21, 2013

Considering the end of things

Very briefly I figured I'd mention the PAIL theme post for the month.

I'd wonder how I've missed it to this point, but man, did I ever. I blame school and the tiny human currently snoozing on me (again...).

We realized a few years ago that it was really time to get things in order, notably when my uncle was going through hospice at the end of his life and how nice it was for everyone to get things squared away. This was in stark contrast to the spouse's grandma who put off making a will for months after her diagnosis of terminal cancer and never did get to it, where her estate was in limbo for several YEARS and we have no idea what she intended to happen with her assets or even what they all were.

We've put it off since then.

It is high time to get to all the end of life planning stuff. We have put it off way too long. I've started the "in case of death" list of where our things are (money, life insurance that we should buy more of, debts, bills, things I don't want my parents to find that my sibling should remove before they do find them, all that jazz). It's in a document online that I'll share and update at least once a year. We've discussed who we want to have custody of the wee ones (squee! plural! yipes!) in the event we both die, but we need to touch base with the siblings to confirm our plans (and to tell the spiritual sponsors of the kid that we have moved them to second position because of the very minor role they've opted to play in her life). Tomorrow for pete's sakes I'm making an appointment to do our will and trust stuff with a local lawyer because IT IS TIME. We are not utterly broke and this is too important to put off.

Do we have the right sized stuff? Yes and no. We rent a house that's the perfect size for 2 kids but not for more or for 2 who cannot share a room. We have a tiny car that fits us snugly but exactly. If/when we add to our family, we'd have to change both of those, but the car is a couple of years and many thousands of miles old and the house is likely temporary along with the place (but maybe not).

On the whole it is high time to finish getting our ducks in a row so we can share that with our parents (and siblings) and be sure that they have done the same. I can guess that one set of parents can direct us to their lawyer who has a folder with all the details, and the other set of parents has been meaning to get to it one of these days. Of course the younger set will be right on top of things and the older set off in the woods expecting to live forever... Sigh...

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